How To Pick Up Super Hot Girls by RSD Todd

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jgnlPb-oZo

“Game is a series of mistakes that gets you closer and closer to correct.” Why? “Because every girl is different.”

Really drink those quotes from Todd’s video in for a moment.

Chasing a cookie-cutter method is like looking for Sasquatch or the Tooth Fairy. Individuality makes the cool, suave charm, one expects from James Bond, to be occasional at best.

This is why I’m in such an intimate relationship with humor – it helps one associate positive emotions (amusement, laughter, endorphins, etc.) with failure and public humiliation. It’s a psychological reprogramming to help you numb yourself to the idea of being seen doing something weird in front of strangers.

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Then there are Todd’s arguments about an abundance mentality and using it to implement a push-away.

Many of us, myself included, have given a woman enough slack to walk all over us because we devalue ourselves by meeting her most ridiculous demands. Those are shit tests. It’s a challenge. It’s an opportunity for you to either comply for fear of losing a girl you haven’t even had yet, or to stand your ground and show you are the prize who she can treat as an equal…or not have at all.

So be sure to be willing to let her go at any time. The moment you feel you need her in order to be happy, reevaluate yourself so she is a part of your life, not a pillar holding it up.

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For more of Todd’s great videos, check out his YouTube channel…

http://www.youtube.com/user/toddfreetour

Reader Mail: 5/11/13

The biggest reason I move these simple questions to the top of the pile sometimes is because they remind me just how foggy the entire world of dating once was in my own eyes. If I couldn’t empathize, I probably never would’ve started this blog to begin with.

This question is very vague and brings up multiple points one must consider…

1. You’re Not A People Pleaser

This means you are not planning dates based on what you think she will like. It’s not your job (or anyone’s for that matter) to read minds. Start each event you plan with an easy rhetorical question: “What do I enjoy?” Answer that honestly and there should be at least one venue you think of to go check out together.

If for some unexpected reason you don’t know of a place, then that means it’s time to explore. Worst case scenario is you search for nearby places on Yelp and randomly pick a spot. This randomness will eventually become more challenging if you are doing the right thing and making a habit of exploring places you’ve never been.

2. It’s About The Who, Not The Where

A date should not be so heavily dependent upon fascinating activities. Yes, activity dates are great…eventually. A first date (or in your particular case, a second date), however, should be basic enough to where you and her are focused primarily on one another.

Attraction and chemistry makes it possible for two people to enjoy the most mundane moments simply because they are with each other. You could go jet skiing or hiking or skydiving with people you genuinely hate…yet still have a blast. It’s the calm, low-energy situations that truly put your compatibility to the test because without a connection and mutual effort to interact, you end up with the awkward silence followed by the sideways hug and the “good night” with you two avoiding eye contact and never speaking again. So make sure she’s infatuated by you, not the hobby you two are doing.

3. Examples Please???

One of my favorite first date spots is a comfy wine bar in my area called Bodega. Lighting inside is dim so you don’t walk in feeling like serious business luncheons would take place there. It’s a wine bar, so no kids will be screaming and running around. Music is mild, meaning its loud enough to avoid eavesdropping, yet quiet enough to hear her speak. There are also plenty of lounge couches, which make appropriate sitting positions possible, as you shouldn’t want a giant table between you two preventing any escalation or flirting in the event there is a connection.

This venue is not limited by ones objectives either. Whether you’re on a casual dating marathon, or looking for your future wife, sitting somewhere cozy and testing to see if you can share an intriguing conversation, playfully joking, and learning about each other, is all a universally beneficial first step.

In addition to those three primary tips, here are some more generic rules one should always follow when planning a date…

-Decide in advance where you two are going and at least give her funny tidbits of hints like “I’m taking you somewhere that has chairs.” This is much better than showing indecisiveness and mistakenly asking “Where do you wanna go?”

-Avoid clubs. Even if you met her in one, that’s not a realistic first date spot. Clubs are more for guys and gals on the prowl. Likewise, keep the party vibe and the amount of booze to a minimum. Getting a woman drunk shouldn’t be a crutch you depend on in order to successfully seduce her. Also make sure the setting has an intimate vibe. How will you know if the vibe is “intimate”? If it’s a lounge that you’d never go to with one of your bros, for fear of being viewed as a gay couple, then that’s perfect for a date with a woman.

-Try to carpool. A good sign you built an abundance of comfort when first meeting is her willingness to meet at your place or hers, so you can carpool to the date location. This is another detail you want to TELL her to do, not ask, because you are confidently assuming she is attracted to you enough to trust you. It should always be a back-up plan to “meet at the venue” and should that happen, make a note to yourself that you need to improve the quality of your interactions from the first introduction to the scheduling of the first date. In the event she complies and preemptively meets at your residence, then should the date go well, you once again assume there is a connection and lead her to your front door (without asking) afterwards. Asking a woman if she wants to come in, in a way, is like asking her “Would you like to reject me?” It’s spineless and you’re smarter than that.

Good luck! 

The Definitive Book Of Pick-Up Lines

Let me start out by forewarning you that the biggest mistake is to take The Definitive Book of Pick-Up Lines by Tucker Max, and its contents seriously. Saying one of these lines with a poker face will cause a woman to react like you’re a sociopath who carries Rohypnol in his pocket. As obvious as this is, those who habitually speak with no expression are totally unaware of it.

Pick-up lines are a type of humor compliance test, much like telling a funny story or your favorite joke. The main goal is to test the listener(s) to see if their sense of humor matches yours. Hence the importance of only using things you truly find funny.

Re-read the previous sentence once more…or however many times it takes to stick in your brain. A confident man knows what he is amused by and shares this personal taste without fear of rejection, an insecure man does not.

Tucker Max, author of the best-selling book I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, published this unique piece of literature in 2001…eight years before that lovely package of short stories. A paperback totaling to a mere 125 pages may sound tiny, but don’t let the size fool you. This is every pick-up line and then some, ranging from the cheesy and cliché, to the appalling and vulgar. There’s a flavor for everyone.

Despite their title, if pick-up lines won’t help with pick-up when used as openers, how does one inject them into a conversation and benefit from it?

Separate Yourself From The Rest

One of my favorites is asking a woman, “What are the worst lines you’ve heard so far?” Regardless of her answer, I can always fire back by purposefully imitating a douchebag and sarcastically using a horrible yet funny line like, “If beauty stank, you’d be the shit!”

So I’m using the line to help her mock the use of pick-up lines. This helps her place me in an entirely different category than the typical douchebag, AND it creates an inside joke between us which builds rapport.

NOTE: This has a VERY high success rate when you use it IMMEDIATELY after you see a douchebag get blown out from saying something really shitty.

Re-Open A Warm Set

A warm set or warm approach, is opposite of a cold approach (approaching strangers). You’ve spoken to her at least once before and at worst, that chat casually faded.

NOTE: Do not do this on blow out sets that brutally reject you.

Chats that drop off where one person politely says “I’m gonna go chat with some friends” are not necessarily bad. You’re still on good terms and have plenty of margin to re-open and redeem yourself. In fact, this is occasionally a necessary strategy, especially when dealing with women with ADD or multiple conversations happening simultaneously.

So if you’re wandering around the venue, and you once again cross paths with that familiar face, try out another line you like, emphasizing the humorous tonality with a smile. “You’d better call your boyfriend and tell him you met a man who doesn’t take batteries.”

Boost Your Text Game

Random pick-up lines are perfect ways to initiate texting, which can quickly be converted to planning the next date.

In addition, if you already have her number then it means you have the green light to say funny things just to make sure she can take a joke.

If the line sounds like something one might misunderstand or take seriously, just be safe and add a wink ; )  or smiley face : )  emoticon at the end.

I’m going to cut you off with those three examples because the best way for you to become proficient with comedic timing and delivery is to keep trying, failing and learning firsthand from those experiences. Pick-up lines are yet another side dish in your arsenal of humor. 

How To Talk About Anything by David Wygant

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zWNcEgifFS4

Guys oftentimes search for the “perfect” opener as if it’s Sasquatch or the Fountain of Youth. No matter how many knowledgeable dating coaches tell them there is no such thing, they stubbornly push forward.

Guys also tell me this very confession time and time again whenever I take CCSM attendees in field – “I’ll be talking to a woman and then my mind will go blank and I’ll run out of things to say.”

It happens to all of us. However, David Wygant makes a perfect and incredibly simple suggestion to fix this in the video above. It’s not an innovative idea. It’s not new to say the least. And like everything else, it doesn’t have a 100% guarantee of working.

What is it?

Asking questions.

You must accept that it is acceptable to enter a conversation and start out by admitting you’re not sure about something, you’re genuinely curious and then asking those you approach to teach you, educate you, broaden your knowledge about something.

Questions are the skeleton key that unlock door after door to countless other topics. Women can answer questions with such detail, that she’ll spoon-feed you countless other details to expand upon. All you need to do is listen for those topics, then take back control of the conversation and make a statement expressing interest in that new topic.

Practice this simple method in all of your discussions. Not just those with women. Try learning something new about a family member or friend. Anyone loves talking about themselves. 

Inner Game with Elizabeth Everett: Edited by Mystery!!

It turns out Mystery – yep, the one and only – stayed up all night recently just to edit the first video from Casanova Crew Santa Monica, where Elizabeth Everett shared all kinds of knowledge about inner game.

Personally I view this act as a perfect example of the bigger picture this community is showing now.

Erik, the world’s most recognized pick up artist, who can charge top-dollar for his time and services, randomly reaching out to a no-name like myself and helping with something like video editing for no particular reason, is a reminder that the heavyweight champions, the gladiators, the most idolized personas of pickup…they’re all passing the torches on to the next generation.

It’s like that old proverbial saying – “Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day; show him how to catch fish, and you feed him for a lifetime.”

Nevertheless, I am typing on a tangent like I oftentimes do and I can only say that the aforementioned perspective is my personal one, and not necessarily that of Liz or Erik. Regardless of the reasons for his spontaneous help with The Jester’s Videos and CCSM, it’s always awesome to have one of the gurus point us in the right direction.

Thanks again for the help, Erik!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yrpYeM8UpEk

The Jester's Videos: JT Tran

http://youtu.be/2aSH6nkftFc - JT Tran speaks at CCSM

There’s a warm, biased place in my heart for the Asian Playboy since he’s the guy who introduced me to pick up. So I had to have him show up and speak at a CCSM event.

Among the many great points he makes in his speech, my favorite pertains to the lazy-minded “shortcuts” we as a society take when evaluating things based on incomplete facts. This coincides with why JT Tran refers to himself as a “holistic dating coach”.

You’ll hear him make the comparison of something cheap vs. something expensive, and what people naturally assume about such objects. You’ll also hear him expand on the importance of removing that tendency to assume from one’s dating life.

This is a point that applies to men and women everywhere – if you are too lazy to learn about someone, rather than assume…you are not ready to date. Those are my words, not JT’s, mind you but I’ve never heard him endorse the idea of people acting prejudice towards one another.

My second favorite point JT makes is regarding the infatuation most guys, especially those just getting started, have with “flash game”. Although it’s entertaining to watch, that just isn’t how a typical encounter looks between a man and woman who are attracted to one another. Flash Game, for the uninitiated, is all of the pick up techniques that look like a performance, as if the guy is putting on a show.

The pick up community has a bad reputation in part because the actual successes guys have go unnoticed. They aren’t seen and do not stand out. Only the epic failures and “blow outs” or rejections are noticed. So onlookers only remember the bad, and are totally oblivious to the good.

Be sure to check out all of my videos on The Jester’s Videos YouTube Channel.

And for more information about JT Tran, visit ABC’s Of Attraction.

How To Talk To Girls by Manwhore

Having interacted with Manwhore on several occasions, as well as seeing him speak at the Ultimate Pick Up Artist Convention of 2012, I already know he’s got the verbal game down.

For the newbies, “verbal game” is the act of communicating with a woman with your voice. Not just talking. You must understand the more complex dynamics of it, including tonality, emotional variations, emphasizing words, slowing down or speeding up your pace of speech at certain points, skipping boring “fluff talk” about topics which are like a turd in your ears. There is a lot to it, but society at large dumbs it down to sound like social skills naturally develop just like your limbs or internal organs.

That’s a crock of bullshit. Any skill requires regular maintenance. Practice. And failure to learn lessons.

With that said, I want you to check out Manwhore’s article: “How To Talk To Girls”

Then go as far as evaluating just how believable your words are when you speak. You may need third-party feedback for this. And the feedback might sting. But the truth is, very few people are too enthusiastic. Most are hiding their emotions and speak like robots. What are they hiding from?

Think about it next time you start a conversation.